I spontaneously combust multiple times a day.
You just don't see the flames.

I was naive. I thought I could wedge the ugly between milestones and watch it decay into the ground as I grinned, finally satisfied. I should have known better. I have been here before.
The ugly never leaves, it only subsides. I can push it up against the walls of me with hard work and chain it to a fence I've built on faith alone, but I cannot kill it. Not this time. Maybe not ever.

I just need to know you're still out there.

Look,

Look how far I've dragged my insides, all entangled in a misshapen bag.

The bloodtrail must go back one thousand miles.

I think it's time to put it all back where it belongs.